Updated: Oct 1, 2018
Life is a crazy journey, no doubt about that! But I never imagined the turn my life would take a little over three months ago. I am mom to three beautiful, absolutely amazing kiddos. Trinity, 17, Willow, just under 13, and Wesley, just under 10.
When I was 20, I discovered I was pregnant with Trinity. Yes, this was unexpected, but I had always anticipated that I would have my kids when I was in my twenties (I really hoped to have my family before I entered my thirties). And so, I embraced this welcome possibility and loved strong and head on into the the next chapter of my life.
Life with Trinity was everything a mother could hope for. Some might say I was biased because she was my first born, but truthfully, she was just a happy and content being from the very beginning. I, of course, being a first-time mom, was obsessed with doing everything perfectly. Trinity, on the other hand, was quite comfortable going with the flow of life. She helped me slow my roll and just enjoy every moment with her.
At 25, I welcomed Willow into our lives. Trinity was SOOOO excited to have a little sister. She was obsessed with "Clifford the Big Red Dog" and was convinced that her new baby sister would be named Hambone Cheesebone. And so, when Willow was born, her dad and I had picked out two names but couldn't decide which best suited her. Therefore, we let Trinity's choice of Hambone Cheesebone be written on her decorative crib card. In hindsight, I'm glad I did because this created a very unique memory for us all.
Willow and Trinity would have their moments of sisterly love and then battling it out over the most seemingly silly things. This continued until around the time Willow turned nine or ten. After sharing a room with each other for awhile, the girls began to see each other as confidantes rather than enemies. I'm not going to say they never fought from this point on, but their relationship was definitely solid. I know, for sure, that Trinity was becoming the go-to person for Willow as she pushed through puberty and all the craziness of adolescence. The bond that formed, and the love they had for each other, was something that many siblings can only wish for.
When Trinity was not quite eight, Wesley was born. Since Trinity and Willow were still in their warring stage, both girls were excited that they might get a little brother. At this point in their lives, they had NOOOOO desire for another sister. And so, Wesley was born and both girls loved him deeply from the beginning. This continued up until the point that he became mobile and started getting into their stuff! Then the love affair seemed to be over.
But no matter what, we have always spent time together as a family. Whether out hiking, just chilling on our deck, or jamming out in the car. I look back over all the times that we have had together, and am so thankful that I never let a career, or anything else, take precedent over creating memories with my kiddos.
I always considered myself blessed that I had never even made a serious trip to the emergency room for an injury related to my kids. So imagine my devastation when the police knocked on my door very early on Feb. 17, 2018, and told me that my oldest daughter was involved in a critical accident, but couldn't give me any details. Even though mother's instinct told me something was horribly wrong when I arrived at the ER, I was still not prepared to accept what the doctors and nurses had to tell me in those coming moments.
Losing Trinity has been a complete devastation to my life as I know it. But I refuse to let my loss tear me and my family down. Trinity would NEVER be okay with that. So instead, I have chosen to band together with some close friends and start Trinity's Way. Trinity touched so many people while she walked this earth. And I have no doubt that she would have continued to do so. That is the purpose of Trinity's Way. Simply to carry on Trinity's legacy.